Raya & Getting Sick

I was soooo looking forward to the Raya weekend, partly coz it was a long break for us, and of coz, all the Raya goodies. But unfortunately, I had to get sick then too! Darn it. Anyway, the group of us kicked off the holidays with a Monopoly/RISK/Mahjong night at CY's place. As usual, got demolished by Henry as he was all conquering on the Monopoly and Risk table :P But yay, did manage to win back on the Mahjong table. *evil laughter*...Surprisingly that nite, we did end up teaming up for Risk, instead of arguing and competing as we normally do. THough we did compete furiously at Monopoly. We had too much fun that night that some of us thought the next day was Saturday -_-

Stayed at home the whole of Friday and didn't even take a nap, unlike proper school days when I desperately crave naps. BUt i was starting to feel out of it by 8pm but refused to stay home. C'mon..it's the eve of Raya, and it's Friday night. But we all had no idea what to do....to go CY's place or to go clubbing? We were all so indecisive and I kept getting phone calls from the Capt who just couldn't make up his mind. So yea, was on the way out when he would call n say this...then five mins later...another call to go another place. Walaoz. We ended up at Soho, but were just sitting around the back, coz it was packed. So me, CY and August decided to go Zhen How for drinks coz we were bored. And then coz they left for MC3, we packed up and went over too. Geez, some ppl just can't take no for an answer...I said I didn't want to drink anymore and though I covered my glass..yea..still ended up with a refill...partly over my fingers too. Luckily my stamina has improved coz when i got home, I was really hin and kinda wanted to throw up. Not because I drank a lot (I didn't!), but bcoz I had a really really bad headache and was coming down with a fever. So yeah, that nite was pretty crappy coz kept tossing and turning and feeling extremely cold despite turning off the air-cond.

Woke up to find my hair was in a mess (and I just got it done! :P) but I was feeling better. Finally decided to join my family for Raya visiting, or else I'd have nothing to eat at home. So for all 3 houses (1 relative, 2 Rotarians)...I kept hearing the same things over n over again. "Are you working? Have you graduated?" Lol. I felt better as the morning went on, but felt very sleepy in the afternoon so slept for about 6 hrs. We went to Xanadu that nite where I got challenged to pool by the Capt. I won the 1st game by default (coz he put in the black ball) but lost the 2nd game pretty badly. What can I say, I havent played in 2 weeks, plus I kinda forgot about placing my fingers liao...Hehe. But when I got home, yea, I was pretty out of it and feeling sick again. So fun.

Once again, the next day saw me feeling better and it was off to visiting for another 3 houses. BUt the 3rd house, we went to Dayang's house where we had yummy cakes she made (Yum, choc cake!) and also the usual Raya food. Ooo..and since we were kinda bored, we went to CY's place where me, CY, Henry and Dominic had a battle of mahjong. Dom was keen to break the curse where the newbie never wins against the 3 of us. Sadly, I was the first to help him break it. It somehow ended up that Henry won the least..ahah...Maybe coz I laughed at him too much or wat but the next day, I got sick again! This time, it was down with flu and cough. The cough was most likely from the Sunny Hill ice-cream I had...coz I still had a little bit of cough earlier...and the flu was probably coz I was in the rain a bit on Sunday and on the Monday itself. Geez, immediate effect :(

Left to Right: Hong Liong, Chyi Yeou, Siew Hie, Henry, Dayang, me, CY, Dominic, Ban Yip

And this is the main reason I updated today. Check out this new Motorola U9, which is mainly a music phone. It looks damm nice, and I'm still wondering what the front is made of. It looks such a solid colour, yet the screen can display the music like tat so nicely. The screen is supposed to be seamless with the rest of the cover, unlike our current phones where u can obviously see the outlines. It's newly announced so should be available by Christmas or early next year.

节拍器 (Metronome) by Jolin Tsai

I saw this video on Youtube, and it's pretty sad but beautifully filmed I think. Her company spent a lot of money on her "Agent J" album and they filmed about 4 MTVs in Prague & London. They also hired famous ppl like Stephen Fung who appears in this video, and Kim Jae Won (who Nicholas Zhang Tung Liang looks like) for both the 'Agent J' and 'What I'm Scared Of' MTV. These 4 MVs have some connections in story and it's quite complicated but well thought out. I think Chinese MTVs have more story compared to the Western ones. Anyway, I like the melody of this song , very melancholic and simple and I think her singing has improved.

Lyrics (from chinese-song-lyrics.com):
是我越来越想你 (Shi Wo Yue Lai Yue Xiang Ni)
还是隐形了自己 (Hai Shi Yin Xing Le Zi Ji)
小心翼翼你的语气 (Xiao Xin Yi Yi Ni De Yu Qi)
配合你的表情 (Pei He Ni De Biao Qing)
我的好胜心为你舍弃 (Wo De Hao Sheng Xin Wei Ni She Qi)
以为这就是爱情 (Yi Wei Zhe Jiu Shi Ai Qing)
直到自己没空气 (Zhi Dao Zi Ji Mei Kong Qi)
才发现不能再继续 (Cai Fa Xian Bu Neng Zai Ji Xu)

我不愿意再为了讨你的欢心 (Wo Bu Yuan Yi Zai Wei Le Tao Ni De Huan Xin)
别让我的心 (Bie Rang Wo De Xin)
像是上紧发条的节拍器 (Xiang Shi Shang Jin Fa Tiao De Jie Pai Qi)
我的呼吸慢慢跟不上节拍器 (Wo De Hu Xi Man Man Gen Bu Shang Jie Pai Qi)
最初的设定 (Zui Chu De She Ding)
我们交叉在不同频率 (Wo Men Jiao Cha Zai Bu Tong Pin Li)
美丽 (Mei Li)
放弃 (Fang Qi)

时间把我们遗弃 (Shi Jian Ba Wo Men Yi Qi)
究竟快乐伤心 (Qiu Jin Kuai Le Shang Xin)
爱要多少世纪 (Ai Yao Duo Shao Shi Ji)
才能够停止寻觅 (Cai Neng Gou Ting Zhi Xun Mi)

不再演你爱的自己 (Bu Zai Yan Ni Ai De Zi Ji)
脱下了语气节拍器 (Tuo Xia Le Yu Qi Jie Pai Qi)
再一细数我的孤寂 (Zai Xi Shu Wo De Ku Qi)
可不可以 (Ke Bu Ke Yi)
不够再跟着你靠近 (Bu Yong Zai Gen Zhe Ni Kao Jin)
我可以安静 (Wo Ke Yi An Jing)
聆听时间倒转的旋律 (Ling Ting Shi Jian Dao Zhuan De Xuan Li)
暂停 (Zan Ting)

Other nice songs that I'm currently listening to include:
1. 背叛 (Betrayal) - 曹格 Gary Chao
2. 情人节快乐 (Happy Valentine's Day) - 曹格 Gary Chao
3. 好朋友 (Just Good Friends) - 罗志祥 Show Luo Zhi Xiang
4. 错了再错 (Keep Making Mistakes) - 张栋梁 Nicholas Zhang Tung Liang
5. 西界 (Westside) - 林俊杰 JJ Lin Jun Jie
6. 如果你也听说 (If You've Heard) - 张惠妹 Zhang Hui Mei
7. 最近 (Recently) - 李聖傑 Lee Shen Jie
8. 手放開 (Let Go) - 李聖傑 Lee Shen Jie
9. 痴心絕對 (Broken Heart's Decision..i think!) -李聖傑 Lee Shen Jie
10. Tattoo - Jordin Sparks (American Idol Season 5 Winner)
11. Inconsolable - Backstreet Boys
12. Walk Away - Paula DeAnda
13. If That's Ok with You - Shayne Ward
14. Do It Well - Jennifer Lopez
15. Umbrella (Acoustic Version) - Marie Digby

Seems like a lot of sad songs huh? Must be the karaoke influence...eheh. So if you're interested in listening to any of these, can always get from me in MSN..ahah!...

A New Date and a New Beginning?

Hey!...Breaking news...I have a new boyfriend, and check him out:

Hahah!!! Handsome or not? lol...Did I fool anyone? Good grief, I brought my bro out to Xanadu with us on Saturday nite, and the workers there thought he was my new bf! Coz they knew Mike was leaving, and so yeah, the next week I bring a new bf. Even Augustine thought so. Lol!! Guess it's the fact that we don't look very alike and he doesn't look like he's younger than me. And maybe no1 expects me to go clubbing with my bro? Gee, first Ah Fung, now my bro. Wahh.

Anyway, me and my 'date' and CY were there earlier than the rest so I taught my bro some of the drinking games which I ended up losing. :( so of coz he enjoyed it. He didn't get to see the usual girls there, but there was this girl who sang an Ah Mei song and a Filipino song...and boy could she sing. THough my bro doesn't know how Ah Mei sounds like..but he thought she sounded like the original singer..she was that good! Then I was supposed to play pool with my bro (I was very prepared to lose) but he ended up playing both games with Henry (coz Henry lost the 1st one and wanted to win back). So, yes, one up for the so-called Chan Paikias. Hahahah! Anyway, we learnt a few more drinking games that nite, and Willie (Xiao Gui) got pretty tipsy...hehez..no thanks to CY and August. But we were pretty guai and went home around 12.30. My bro and Henry ended up at Soho (separately though!) and I have no idea what time they left. In conclusion, my bro only liked the drinking games...but finds Xanadu boring. Duh, no gals of coz he thinks it's boring..ahah

I had to go home early coz I'd promised my mum to b her photographer for her company's aerobics event the next morning. It was in conjunction with their Life Style Fair so they were promoting health and she was worried there wouldn't be any pics for their own records. It started at 8am so I had to wake up at 7.30am...and I'd slept around 3.30-4.30 coz I couldn't sleep without my phone (my bro had kidnapped it to msg some girl -_-||). I didn't sleep well coz I knew I had to wake up early. Yet, it was pretty interesting to see these ppl I used to work with doing aerobics. Some of them still wore heels le...so hebat. I took over 100 pics just for the aerobics session and I already felt tired. Esp when the sun came out and looking at all of them working out. Once it was done, i packed up and went back to bed at 9.30am.

However, 2 hours later, my mum calls and asks if I could bring down the camera coz she forgot she still needed it. So ok, crawl out of bed and head down again. This time, things were in full swing and the different booths exhibiting various things from BMWs, stem cell banking, interior design companies, phones and Sony LCD TVs were up. So I went with her from stall to stall to check things out. I tried out the new iPhone, which Sheer Unique is offering for RM3000+! OUch, but they have the crack already, so you can actually use Digi and Celcom with it, unlike in the US. But not available for Maxis users yet. It was pretty ok, music and video was good but interface was a bit laggy and not always responsive to touch. Must be careful on how u touch and where. :P

Kuching Specialist Hospital was there and they were offering free general health screening where they would test ppl's blood pressure, blood glucose and BMI. I wasn't too keen on the glucose part coz they prick ur finger with a needle...but since my family has a history of diabetes, I thought I'd better. I was also kinda worried that I would have high blood pressure coz I've been stressed out lately but luckily it was 120/80 which is normal! Good thing I didn't bring Henry huh? Sure would have high blood one.....Lol..just jk. Then, BMI time where they measured my height and weight. I'm only 152.2cm le...so damm short. And sadly I seemed to have gained back 1kg?? So yeah, I'm 2 kg overweight. SHIT....must start cutting down...I think it was all that late night junk food (Goodbye Koko Krunch!). I wasn't too happy about it but it was time to worry more about the blood glucose test then. I watched them get out the new needle and I didn't want to look when they did it. So all I felt was this quick n hard whack to my right ring finger and hey presto...blood! My blood glucose is normal for someone who hasn't eaten since the night b4 so yay. All ok except my BMI *sobs* Now my bro has evidence to back up his teasing. SHIT.....must wipe that smirk off his face...must lose that 2 kg.

Anyway, must have been too tired from all the late nights, the over-thinking, split personalities, emo-ness and combined with the weather, the lack of sleep on Saturday/Sunday night that I felt sick today. At first I thought it was just the normal Swinburne aircond but i started feeling extra tired n cold. Plus, I didn't have much appetite. Symptoms of a fever for me. Crawled into bed after class and still felt cold even without the aircond...so yes, I'm down with a slight fever. Feeling slightly better after the nap and medicine. But will definitely go to bed early tonite...it's a long week ahead and I've got lots to do! I must get well before the Hari Raya holidays too...all that food and I can't enjoy? Damm..2kg to lose le....alright, in moderation then. *pouts*

OH yea!..What about the new beginning? Some of u might have noticed I don't put my MSN nick as Princess anymore. Well, just felt that it's kinda kiddy and mayb I'm not like that anymore. So yea...time to grow up....I'm still surrounded by guys, but they don't quite treat me like tat..and well..it's time to be just simple old me. ;) Btw, you guys must be thinking, wah,....updating frequently le! Well, just felt like letting out my thoughts here. Healthier than keeping everything in...and not many ppl read my blog..so yeah. And I guess ppl might think..Cheh..it's all about her life nia...but hey..it's my blog..up to u if u wanna read. If not...then..nvm!...Should never care what others think, as long as you haven't done anything wrong and you're happy about yourself.

Jom! Buka Puasa food & other ramblings

As per yesterday's post, I had some food cravings. The original plan was to go to the Buka Puasa market with CY and maybe Henry or my bro. But what the hell...I got pissed..and Henry of coz got pissed as well...and big time this time. So yeah, am in deep shit now. F*ck my temper and stupid emotional personality, keeps getting me into trouble I can't settle. Probably will break out the vodka later...Yay!..*sarcasm detected*

Anyway, CY couldn't make it last minute so I told my bro it's ok, he doesn't need to skip class to go anymore. But he insisted on going, so yea, I had to wait at Swinburne in the car for him for almost 1 hr. Then, we got stuck in heavy traffic for over half an hour...and all this when the fuel tank was showing its warning sign. So yes, add more to the joy of my shitty day. Sorry for all the profanities. Just feel like it today. Well, we reached the Satok area at almost 6 and my bro goes, "Oh, you overshot it, need to turn around under the bridge." To which I go, "What the hell! Nice navigating you idiot" and he gives me this sheepish grin. So yea, you can tell our relationship has improved to the stage that we can insult each other n not get into huge fights. Luckily coz I don't need anymore conflict for the rest of the day.

In the end, we had to park at Wisma Satok and walked over. I suddenly became like a little girl with her older brother while crossing the road, "EEekks! Wait for me, I don't know how to cross!" And even more so when the first thing I saw at the market was some guys selling cotton candy!! I actually havent been to a Buka PUasa market for probably 2 years? So yeah, I was pretty unfamiliar, so I just followed my bro around and tried to figure out what we wanted to eat. And surprise surprise, he paid for his own stuff on his own accord! Probably the only pleasant surprise in my whole day. Either we were really hungry or greedy, but we really bought a lot of stuff between the two of us. We spent like RM30 on everything, probably also coz we were so tempted by all the variety. Plus food tends to make me happy these days...so yea...the more food the happier I am rite? Especially in the f*cked up condition I'm in. Once again, excuse the French.

When we were about done, we saw a stall selling BBQ seafood and my bro went "Look! Your stingray!" So the final tally of food is as follows:

Andrea: Chicken satay, special kebab (chicken, beef & cheese), roti telur, cotton candy
Aaron: Special kebab, nasi lemak, beef murtabak, crispy popiah
Shared: BBQ stingray, keropok lekor, huge packet of sugarcane juice at only RM2

What's a food entry without a pic rite? And it's nicely labeled for u to see what's what!

So yea, now I feel like a stuffed pig, I'm so damm full. But as someone's still pissed at me..and I realize my life is getting more n more shitty..what with labs, projects, FYP piling up...I'm starting to feel the pressure..and yet I want to go drink!...WTF rite? I feel like puking everything out, I make myself sick. But I won't do it on purpose. Don't worry, don't call the ppl in white coats yet.....I am really screwed up now huh? God help me. Or maybe I don't want help. Maybe I just want to self-destruct. Stop being the good girl...the responsible and level-headed girl everyone thinks I am. I just want an escape. Food and alcohol are only temporary relievers. Am I being melodramatic for attention? Maybe! But maybe I need the attention...the concern...the sayang...but I don't know if I can take it from just anyone. Heck, I can be damm manja with my younger bro..what do you think...I must be damm desperate already.

Where's my drinking buddy when you need him? Oh yeah, he's pissed at me. My bro's out with his frens so damm. And the rest? We're supposed to b at home, doing DSP/FYP etc etc. So that's what I'm gonna try and do now. The key word being TRY of coz..since we have no idea what DSP is all about. I am seriously f*cked up now and I haven't had a bit of alcohol, yet. SHit. Tonite is gonna suck big time.

Emotional Rollercoaster / Split Personality

What do I mean by split personality? Well, Geminis are known to have split personalities, they can be sociable and happy one second, gloomy and moody the next. That's me, if you know me. Been going through some changes in my life, mostly in how I think and act. After 2 years of staying home, doing 'goody-goody' stuff, I've suddenly felt the urge to go clubbing. This of coz probably has to do with the return of Esther who wanted to go clubbing, and also due to Capt. Henry gua. I started going to Soho/Grappa with Esther and her frens as well as our other cousins. The strange thing was that my bro came along...so we hung out a lot those days. Now looking back, I guess going clubbing together has kinda brought us to better terms. Probably coz he's grown up a bit, and guess he can see how I am..and vice-versa. It's probably to do with me nagging him less too...i mean..let him make his own mistakes rite? I can't keep protecting him...but yea...kinda fun to hang out with him at times...his damm big ego makes me laugh..Met a few new ppl then through Esther too....so it was pretty interesting....

5 cousins: Top- Me and my bro.
Bottom (L-R) - Esther, Ah Tee, Saw Hui (Eric of Eric Salon at 3rd mile above Sunflower Bakery)

But after Esther left, I changed to Xanadu, since I don't have any dancing kaki. Haha! Xanadu's pretty fun too...last time when it was still called Spiderweb, we used to go for karaoke. Now we're still into karaoke but on busy nites, it takes quite long till it's our turn to sing. So we've now learned several drinking games..plus I've made frens with the workers there..plus the boss..so yea..we kinda have special treatment, esp with Henry there. He's there so often it's like his home! ahah. Like for Soho, my bro does the booking or deals with the ppl there and for Xanadu, it's Henry. Tho my gal-frens think I'm moving up there too...lol. Oh, and I've gotten more keen on clubbing type of music...but it's also a mix with all these emo-mandarin songs..must b from all that karaoke..

So why the emotional rollercoaster? Put it this way, not every1 can handle my changes or my sudden urge to do wilder stuff. Sure ppl might say I'm still very kuai..not doing anything too wild, but hey, for me they think it's wild. Clubbing is nth much to most ppl, but nowadays I go every weekend...I've gotten piss-drunk..and no, it wasn't a pretty sight and not something I'm gonna repeat. But basically, my personality is changing too. I'm more keen on playing...not wanting to settle down into the serious stuff. I guess it's to do with my feeling that it's now my last sem of uni life. After this, we're gonna enter the working world and we can't enjoy as much coz it'll be work work work, climb the corporate ladder, meet targets...etc. So I guess I felt that I might have wasted some of my uni years and I'm making up for it now. My bro must feel that I'm trying too hard..but what the heck rite? Better late than never. I hear stories from my relatives that they regret not playing more, coz they can't play or enjoy much now...so yea...I'm 22, gotta enjoy when I still can right?

Yet, the shitty thing is that the other part of me thinks...I'm playing too much..how about my studies, my FYP which is still hanging there....then I go...WTF AM I THINKING OR DOING?! Is it worth it? The question that plagues me these days is...am I giving up something good for something bad...or do I just want the bad thing just coz it's new and exciting....am I sacrificing something more important? Or is part of me hanging on to the old just coz it's good, safe and confirmed? I wonder what it is that I really want...

Edit: In addition to all this, I feel that I don't have much emotions these days...at most..I can obviously feel anger...but I rarely truly feel happy....i feel cold...whatever happens...it is only for the moment...it doesn't last...i feel that i've gone back to being 'batu'....the rock who feels nothing except anger. And that worries me...I should be feeling so much more. I want to be happy...but I can't...I take out my anger on my innocent friends..esp the Capt....and the rest are stuck in between...and when I get angry...it's for no apparent reason other that I'm not happy with my life...so yea..pretty shitty...i feel like drinking...but i can't....not just for this...i need to control it...what the heck is going on......

All this emotional baggage is wrecking havoc with my body...I lost over 1 kg in the last 2 weeks...but I got more pimples and white hair -_-||. Nowadays I also get a lot of food cravings but bcoz I don't feed the cravings, I don't eat much dinner and sorta starve till lunch the next day, coz that's when I can decide what to eat with CY and Henry. What do i crave for? Here's the updated list:
- BBQ stingray with sambal
- smoked chicken / BBQ chicken wings
- takoyaki
- beef/lamb kebab (the type in the Lebanese bread)
- bakulong (something like pickled mango or similar fruit)
- shepherd's pie..or something with mashed potatoes and meat!
- salad with bacon/cold cuts, potatoes...

Damm, just made myself hungry..*tummy rumbles* And of coz, when I feel frustrated and moody as I do now but don't know why...I feel like drinking....to forget about stuff...but I know it's not good to depend on alcohol. Which is why I will go and watch some movie after this. Probably Las Vegas season 1 or Van Wilder: Rise of Taj or Hairspray. Something to distract me.

Before I forget, Michael and Burger are now in KLIA, waiting for their Royal Dutch Airlines flight to Amsterdam and then to Brussels, Belgium. Their ultimate destination is Leuven, Belgium. They were accepted as Software and Research Engineers (or something like that) with Materialise, which is a software company based in Belgium. They're going to Leuven for 3 months training and will come back to work in KL. So yea, pretty good huH? Getting to go to EUROPE, all expenses paid trip, allowance given etc, good pay. Damm! Haha...but I'm not really keen on the job..I'm a crappy engineering student..most ppl think I'm a business student..or would be better off as. So yea, I probably would end up in a business job in the future...hey..I'm keen on sales engineer post! Anyway..all the best to them...hope they have a great trip ..and they learn lots...experience the European life and come back safely ;) For more details and to keep updated on their adventures, u can check Mike's blog.

So hey..long emo ramble from me today....but guess I feel better now...didn't have anyone to talk to just now..so...yea..let it all out here i guess. Btw, check out my deviantart, have updated some new pics. So, till next time!

They say this pic makes me look slimmer and like a giant but i think it's rather emo, so suits me now.